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Iman's Progress

September 2016 - Iman is already 13 years old this year. After 2 years since my last post, today I managed to write something on Iman's progress. Alhamdulillah, after 4 years being terminated from Autism Lab, I managed to get a teacher for him. A freelance Occupational Therapist, Cikgu Tasya. 2 weeks after I saw a guy walking around without shoes and I cried, I came to know about this teacher, a week after that day I saw that poor guy. I had imagined what will happened to Tajul Iman when I was no more in this world. I am so happy and thanks God for bringing that teacher to me. I designed a name card, purposely made to support my son's therapy and treatment.

With the donations from people out there I thank the God for giving my son a consistent therapy at an average of 2 hours a week. After 25 sessions of therapy, since Syawal this year, I saw some progress on Tajul Iman. He had fewer tantrums, more relax, had yet to come up with any single household damages like broken sliding doors, broken TV and furniture.

It was just one case that he broke down my car windscreen again. That was because of  Hakim, my nephew, who used to tease him again and again when my hubby was going out from the car to buy some food at a grocery. I understand that it is not easy to treat him. I came to know a friend in KL whose Autistic son showed a good progress, that was after a 3 years consistent therapy, at least 2 hours a week, never missed. I wish I can get some consistent contribution throughout this years, until I can see a positive maintenance on his behavioral problems.

But for now, beside his little progress, I still have to witness him still tearing his own clothes everyday, also have his sleeping problem at night. Yesterday it was so terrible when I had to stay up until 6 am! Thanks God I have no morning class on Wednesday. Last night, he didn't sleep at all. I just managed to have a 2 hours nap after he himself got tired at 10 am the next morning. We slept together until 12 pm. I had a severe backache now, at my 45 yr of age. Maybe it is due to my position during night time when I used to sleep while sitting on my sofa. I rarely had an opportunity to sleep well at night.

I used to asleep while looking after him and I suddenly had to wake up quickly when I noticed something was burning in my kitchen. A 13 year old Autistic boy was frying his own crackers, with too much oil in the pan and he put some rubber band on the stove until the flame catched the burning oil! My kitchen was almost in fire If I didn't aware of the burning smell from the kitchen!

April 2014 - It's time for me to get to tell you the real story about Tajul Iman, after I had pen off for so long. To give myself a room for my Phd. To give my son a special care for him to cope with a drastic termination from UKM. Poor boy. He got to face all this just because of a MISTAKE I had done!

For my Phd progress, I know it's almost time for me, UKM is giving me another one year, but until now, I am almost to say NO to my Phd. My son comes to me as a priority now. When I'm 6 feet under the ground, the God will never ask me "did you complete your Phd Laila?" But the most crucial task for me to complete now is as a mother of an Autistic boy, severe Autism and ADHD, what was my contribution to my son?

My son was terminated from the lab at UKM on 9th of July 2012, I received the termination letter on the 6th, which was 3 days before the termination day. I was like crazy when my son was terminated so sudden after I complaint about a teacher's attitude towards me. I cried and cried, thinking of where should I send my boy? I work in Shah Alam, I stay in Bangi. My husband was in Tawau, Sabah. My gratitude to my friend Sabrina, Kak Nita, Kak Dah, especially Puan Norma for helping me to cope with my hard times. 

I remembered that day, I made an appeal to Dr Hasnah Toran, but she never listened, I begged for her apologized and said that I was willing to say sorry to that particular teacher I complaint about, but she put another excused for terminating my son. She claimed that I picked up my boy so late everyday (I commute along the way from Shah Alam back to Bangi every day, sometimes even to Puncak Alam for my class, but they never consider. Thinks goes so well before my hubby was transferred to Tawau, but since Jan 2011, I was in a hard time when I got to rush every day, commuting from Bangi to Shah Alam then back to Bangi, until I can't make it on time (5 pm to pick up my boy). Whatever reasons she gave to us, it's just it never comes into my mind that somebody who always talks about Autism children, their rights etc etc until she can come up with such a silly decision. Pity my boy.

In a meeting with the parents, (the best part I was not informed about the meeting)  I was defamed to make a report to the Risk management of UKM but I did not do so. I just went to see the Dean, begging her for her to consider my son, so that he can continue schooling at Maia UKM. The parents of Autism Children at Maia UKM were so angry with me, some of them were even end up with not talking to me at all until now! The best part I was banned from the facebook group " Autism Malaysia" for telling the TRUE story about my poor son. I mentioned about MALAYSIA's  big AUTISM MOM for her emotional grievances until she terminated my son from the lab. That was not her name that I wanted to highlight. It was her emotional decision making that JEOPARDISE my son's future, my son's right for education! But what to do? I'm just a small person in Autism Malaysia. Who am I?

My husband got to make a prompt decision, after my son's termination from UKM. He applied for a 4 months half paid leave (15 th July to 31st Oct 2012) so that I can work and he can stay at home taking care of Tajul Iman. Life was so hard that time. We faced financial constraints. Problem still continued from November 2012 onwards. When he was back to Tawau after his 4 months leave,  I suffered again, my life go crazy again until I submitted my 6 months half paid leave (from 1st Feb 2013 to 31st July 2013).  I made an effort to make myself report my duty at UiTM Dungun. I thought of going back to Dungun is the only way for me to cope with my carrier as a lecturer, my role as a mother, a wife, to get a well balance QUALITY OF LIFE!. I want to offer my gratitude to my Dean at Faculty of Hotel and Tourism UiTM Shah Alam for letting me go back to Dungun in peace.

My son regressed a lot since he was terminated from UKM. I cried a lot. I just couldn't cope with my Phd anymore.  He came back to his previous behavior before I send him to UKM, he peas anyway he want, he threw his tantrums almost everyday, asking for "Maia UKM, Maia UKM" until I really suffered a lot. Everybody in the family was affected by his behaviour! My thanks to Hasnah Toran for what she did to my son. Maybe this is the beginning of my Journey to form an Autism Centre in Dungun! I must make sure every Autism child will have their right for education.

I went to see a children psychologist in Kajang General Hospital, Prof Dr Hamidin Awang and he told me my son regressed so bad as he couldn't take the way he was terminated drastically from UKM. Now I see the effects of an immatured decision made by a specialist in Autism Education! My son is suffering so badly until now!

So people out there, please tell your contacts, parents who also need to have a proper education for their Autism children. Please get back to me ASAP as I desperately want to form a centre in Dungun. Make them call me at 011-26451058 or 0199691886. I had already formed a facebook group name "Kelab Autism Dungun" to get a support from the parents in Dungun. Please like this page and help me to provide a centre here ASAP.

Jun 2011- It is already 2 years since my son was sent to the Autism Lab at UKM. Thanks to God as until now there are some positive outcomes:

  • No more temper tantrums
  • Eye contact improves a lot
  • Able to go to the toilet on his own
  • Started to pronounce a few words (but yet to form a sentence)
I want to offer my gratitude to Dr Hasnah Toran, her husband Mr. Suffian and their team (researchers and volunteers). Also to Faculty of Education, UKM for their concern to support the Autism Lab called MaIA.